Posing in a NAKED photoshoot

If I preach body acceptance and appreciation for what our bodies can do on paper and online, then I think it is only right that I back it up with some real sh*t to show for it.

When I applied, I did it so quickly that my negative thoughts didn’t have time to catch up to what my hands were typing. In under a minute, the ‘send’ button was clicked, and then hit the wave of overwhelming dread and ‘what the fudge did I just do you crazy woman?!’. I then got an email, about a week later, asking to whether I was still keen and if I wanted to secure my place in the shoot – this one caused a stew in my head to begin, and took me a lot longer to reply. Almost immediately, my mind was filled with the negative body thoughts… you are in no shape to do this, why would anyone want to look at you, but your thighs are like this and not that, your don’t have a flat tum or defined abs, do you really want your tits out on show… it was full on, it was a rush, and I was overwhelmed. That email sat in my inbox for a solid 24-hours. I had to psych myself up a number of times before I wrote “YES”, and many more times before I hit send.

Boom.

It was gone.

There was no turning back for me now.

The day came, and I made sure my morning was fully booked up with other activities to ensure my mind did not dwell on the event that was about to take place, more than I knew it already would. There was no fasting, no ‘cleanse’, no radical exercise regime, and no other negative behaviours in the lead up to this. If Megs was going to do this, Megs was going to do this the right way – free of disordered actions.

It started off really strange and awkward; a bunch of clothed strangers, sitting in a room, who – in a short time – were going to be baring all to each other in the name of body positivity and a good laugh. Around the groups, nervous introductions were had, brief given by the photographers, and then it was time for the kit to come off.

Top.

Bottom.

Bra.

Photo time.

Needless to say, my body felt like a statue, tense – full of nerves and negativity. The first few shots I was overwhelmingly aware of every sensation and location of my body – there was a smile on my face and a few nervous laughs; but all I was thinking was f*ck.

This lasted about two minutes. This is when fighter Meg kicked in. All of these nude people around me were in the same position as I was, and probably far too much in their own head – like I was – for any comparison or judgement of what others were looking like. Had I given any judgy thoughts about other people’s bodies in the room? Goodness no! The only thoughts I had were how freaking amazing we all were for being brave and ballsy enough to do this! In this instance, all bets were off – it was time for me to have some fun with this crazy situation.

So, I did. The photos taken speak for themselves. I am only sharing with you one – the ‘Adam & Eve’ shoot – out of respect for those who took part, and out of fear that this would be classed as pornography or the like. If you want further photos – you’ll have to get the issue of CANTA magazine that this is published in (link will be added here once the online article goes live!).

What did I learn from this experience?

1. Bodies are so diverse and beautiful

2. We spend too much time in our heads worrying about what we look like and hypothetical judgments we think others are making about us – when, in fact, this is just a game being played out in our heads

3. If you have a problem with seeing breasts, it is not the body part themselves that are the issue, but rather the sexual attachment and connotations society has placed on them. If a man can walk around topless on a beach – showing their nipples for the world to see – you are damn sure that I believe a woman can do the same, and should not be seen as anything more than a personal choice

This was hard, but so DAMN worth it.

What’s better? IT AIN’T OVER YET.

Yes, a different stage will be hit by this gal very soon.

And you better believe that I will document it all.

Until next time!

Your friend, Rawing Meg xx