Suicide - When is Enough, Enough?

Suicide.

A single word that can really make your bones turn cold, stomach drop, and the most invincible cry.

New Zealand is in a world of trouble with its suicide statistics. Over 600 people lost their lives to suicide last year; double the road toll for the same time period.

I know what feeling suicidal is like. Feeling like you are drowning in the middle of a lake with no sight of land or rescue, convincing yourself that there is no getting better, the feeling of numbness, not being loved, & an overwhelming feeling of not wanting to exist anymore. An act toward suicide is not something you do on a whim, it goes against your basic human instinct and nature to do something that has the possibility of killing you.

I also know what it is like to see others in the throws on mental illness and what contemplation of and actions of suicide looks like. I wish I didn’t, but I do. I do not see selfish or selfish people; I see some of the strongest people that I know, I see a desperation for help and a light in seemingly never-ending darkness, I see people that just need guidance through a time in their live and a hand to hold.

Many ask why, what are we doing so wrong that so many people are not seeing their value in their life and that they are worthy of living?

There has been a blame-game of media, popular TV shows, our resistance to change the “she’ll be right” and “just get over it” attitude, and on-going negligence toward talking about the hard stuff.

We cannot solely blame the likes of 13 Reasons Why for this; it was a program that put the hard-to-swallow realities of the repercussions of suicide. It was not glamourised nor sugar-coated, and this may have worked to both its favour and detriment to the intended impact the show wanted on viewers. It is society that failed people for not equipping people with the tools and supporting factors that meant this intended message was delivered, not the failures of producers or creators of the show. In my opinion; you should have felt outraged and very uncomfortable watching the show, but it should not have driven people to follow in the footsteps of Hannah. That is where society has failed us.

We live in a society…

• Where we are still discouraged for speaking about our emotions, if they aren’t positive

• Where we are still pushing aside talking about our feelings, in favour of the “kiwi” attitude of she’ll be right, and just getting over it

• Where suicide is still treated as a curse-word and a taboo issue to discuss

• Where suicide is still seen as a selfish act by the individual

• Where we “commit” suicide, rather than losing our lives to it

We live in a society that is failing us; not doing enough, and not protecting our most vulnerable

We should not need to be teaching children to be resilient to the negative harrowing pressures of suicide and risk of mental illness, but we are. Why? Because we are not dealing with the societal structures that are making a toxic and mentally damaging environment the norm of what we live in. Children should not need to be resilient to be able to handle the negativity of our society, they should be resilient so they can reach their absolute potential in a society that fosters positivity and encouragement.

We need to do more than address those who are suicidal, or at high risk of suicide; aka – the ambulance at the bottom of the hill. What about the reasons why the ambulance needs to be there in the first place? What about the reasons behind people needing those ambulances?

For any and all of your struggling; I implore you to speak up, to seek help, and to not give up on yourself. There are so many of us rooting for you, and who will continue to do so and support you through things. You are not weak, do not feel ashamed or guilty, you are not a burden.

There is light, there is hope, and there is reason to keep going.

Your friend,

Rawing Meg xx

Need help?

• Call or text 1737

• Lifeline – for Suicide Crisis Support 0508 TAUTOKO (0508 828 865)

• Youthline – call 0800 376 633, or text 234

• My email – rawingmeg@gmail.com